You cannot miss yourself!

The Self knows how to find itself better than any teacher or anything else. There is no way to avoid it. You cannot miss yourself!

Namaste

Roshi

Benjamin Smythe

Benjamin is inspiring to listening to. A beautiful talk....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zKqcRB8MqOQ

His homesite:

http://benjamintsmythe.com

/

Namaste

Roshi

Shunyata, a Danish mystic

I love the story of Baba Sorensen....

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alfred_Sorensen

http://www.nonduality.com/shun.htm

Namaste

Roshi

European Masters

There is a interesting site for those who are looking for european teachers. I like the clips, the site is running by Premananda (http://www.premananda.de/). Good questions, I would say:

http://conscious-websites.com/blueprints_european/low/index_en.html

Quote of the day:

Our own self loves you more than you.

Namaste

Roshi

!

Rest in the observation and recognize what sees.

Namaste

Roshi

The moment

-If you let go, stop holding, you will bee free and here. If you make the moment your priority.

Namaste

Roshi

The magic

Even when I do not get anything out of this situation, the question is; "W H A T can I give?"...that's the magic. Then all is given.

Keep looking around, what to put back.The hidden harmony, what needs to be done.

Namaste

Roshi

non-dualfroude

The ultimate froude is the non-dualfroude (!). Because now you think you got "it". This non-dual stuff cannot be wrong. Non-duality has the intellectual answers to everything. But the heart knows....still something is missing....what? That we can only answer for ourselfs.

Namaste

Roshi

A tip !

On the net there is a number of interesting sites wich provide videos on the subject. Here is some of them:

http://www.here-now-tv.com/

http://www.conscious.tv/

http://www.stillnessspeaks.com/

http://www.nevernothere.com/

http://batgap.com/

Quote of the day:

Thats why you call the search the self- knowledge this "who am I?" or the hint "that the I that can percieve can't be YOU This is the "not-finding" who you are. There is an absolute "not finding". You look in all places, in all situations...you look in the "real" world, the formless world, the mind, the awareness...and you do not find yourself...and in a glimpse of a second you realize, possibly that...."ALL WHAT YOU CAN RECOGNIZE CANT BE WHAT YOU ARE and THIS IS - THEN"----nothing has happened.

That this story of that buddhist who tries to tame his mind/know himself...you start in the world,- you see, the world is not real, you then move into the formless, nothingness, and realize, thats not real neither. You examine the awareness then, and you see YOU can be aware of this too so you can't be the awareness neither so then you go back to the pub and keep on drinking.

Karl Renz http://www.karlrenz.com/


Good luck!

Namaste

Roshi

(?)

That we expereience anything at all is remarkable, when you think about it. What or where is this experiencing entity? And how is it that we know with such great certainty that we exist at all?

Namaste

Roshi

Seeking and finding

When the seeking drops or falls away doesn't mean tha you stop finding.

Namaste

Roshi

All over the place

There is no "me" to find, because the "me" is all over the place, it is everywhere.

Namaste

Roshi

My words...

Take away the "me" from everything that is happening. Nothing disappears; the world is still there, but in an impersonal way. The world is free of the mind. The mind was the disturbance. It is quite and still, relaxation arises. The "me" thought is not necessary....If the "me" identification is taken away, what is left is your natural state.

Namaste

Roshi

"What is life all about?

A close look in the main questions about our self and life in general. It could sound like;

"What is life all about?

A good question, isn,t it?

or...

What is it in me that makes this life happening to "me"?

or...

What am I asking??

Where is this life?....in me....or outside of me?

Is there any line between outside or inside?

I cannot find it.....who is trying?

I just cannot know....

Maybe life itself.

The thinking needs an answer but not life itself.

Life is enough into itself.

:-)

Namaste

Roshi

My Story

My search of the truth begun in my early youth. The big questions were hanging around all the time. Such questions which everyone naturally sometimes question. Once I was on a visit to one of my dearest friends and was reading a magazine for seekers. I read an amazing article of Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh. I felt a great yes to his way of explaining things, his quotes and comments. On some level he made a strong impression on me, I wanted more. At the same time I read books of TM-meditation, J Krishnamurti and of a Indian Guru called Sri Aurobindo and his movement. One of the main books this time was "Journey to India" by Paul Brunton. His struggle and search for a true Guru in India. He finally met Ramana Maharshi after a long struggle.

There is a saying in India, which I read in the book, it goes; "when the student is ready the master appears." In other words, I do my best but ultimately it is not in my hands. That quote somehow felt true.

One Event also in my early youth I still have a great memory of happened when I was walking on a small bicycle road. Suddenly there was a so called jump in consciousness. My sense of a personal self was crystal clear. My identity as a person felt complete. Before there were just the world, but now there seem to bee a world AND a 'me'.

The teenage period was chaotic, confusing, anguish full and lot of seeking. I wanted to do something with my life, I was after the Big One, to be famous was nothing, to be rich was futile, I was after God himself. India seemed to have something to offer, I looked for the east, Yogis , Gurus, Avatars, Buddhists and so on....After a while, I think it was 1984 I met a disciple and a devotee who was initiated to a Indian Guru from north of India. I was young and open to anything, he make a great influence on me. He as a person was also the total contrast to me. I saw that there was alternative way of living, to be. I had found a friend for life. This maybe sounds odd but it is just a way of expressing what took place. I could see that he was a light onto himself. He was luminous. That integrity, being, presence that light so to speak shine in the pictures of his guru. I wanted to meet him, I wanted to be initiated at any cost.

One Zenmaster wrote a book called "the three pillars of Zen". In one chapter an American housewife got a great awakening experience, a satori after a retreat, I would say. It hit me quite hard. She said;

"I am dead, there is nothing I can say is 'me'. There in reality has never been any 'me'. It is just a way of explaining things, a image in the mind, a pattern. I was dizzy and immensely happy. Everything that I gazed at radiated of beauty. In reality there is nothing to know. The physical world is an endlessly ocean of movement, time existence. But at the same time an infinite ocean of silence and emptiness. Every object is transparent and alive. ....there is nothing to do. to 'be' is a complete action in itself."

The point was that can this happened to an ordinary American housewife, then it can happened to me too.

In the spring of 1985 I was allowed to be initiated by the Gurus represent ant in Sweden and in the following winter I met the Guru in Bombay. I was 'doing' meditation, vegetarian, non alcohol, and still reading a lot. Rajneesh, Castaneda, Tibetan called Tartan Tulku (Time, Space and Knowledge) and a Swedish professor on sociology called Kaj Håkansson (The unseen), the Tibetan book of the dead and so on.

My first meeting with mother India was a big chock. The heat, the smell mixture of diesel, dust, incenses, spicy food, latrine, open fires, burnt rubber. Beggars, the horrible traffic, noise and faces everywhere. I was lost in this chaos. But in away I was familiar with chaos, I had it inside. After a while a great love started to arise to Bombay and India. A feeling of being at home. This is the true life; chaos, insecure, colors, traffic jams, people, faces, nothing works in the way you want. Beautiful, life as it is, how it is.

By heart I knew that my Guru was 'true' but there were lot of stuff in the teaching that didn't fit, it didn't make sense. I tried to 'make' meditation but it was a catastrophe, the body was acing everywhere. Something was wrong, but I didn't knew what. I was young and confused. Life was miserable. Identity crisis. Concepts, concepts, talks and words.

Anyway, two main points was clear "Anything that leeds to meditation cannot be wrong and what is in India is here to. Where ever you are, you are there". This was my newearned guidlines.

Between 1985 and 1990 I studied Indian Astrology. Interesting indeed. But the main lesson from these studies is how to see how concepts, believes has a great impact on the mind. The minds attempt to control future at any cost, manipulate God for its own purpose. Trying to figure it out what’s Gods next step would be. If you try use astrology in order reach a better life or finding some truth in it you will be disappointed, it is interesting but useless. My experience. I missed and longed for the juice of life. Life was desert like. Life was a mixture of working for a living, trying to make some kind of relationship to the other sex, and the constant seeking for the truth.

My Guru and Rajneesh (now Osho) passed away the same year 1990. A new Guru succeeded my guru and a new era toke off with a new approach. But the main thing was that the meditation did not work for me. Where is the fireworks, when will the goods be delivered, I was confused. The contradictions in the teachings. Concepts. Where is the real stuff? Inside the teachings explanations were lacking. As a spiritual map it seem to be a catastrophe, for me anyway. Maybe it works for others but not for me, who knows.

In 1990 I made a journey to The new Gurus Ashram and hade several talks which cleared up some issues. I could sense the same radiance from him as from my former guru. I was happy. Still impossible to sit in meditation, even if I tried. I hade a lovely time in the Ashram. Everything has an end, this to. But now there is some kind of a trust, or faith was growing inside. India in my heart forever.

I met the new Guru for a second time in Germany, Mainz, lovely Satsangs. Back to everyday life in Sweden. Nothing was actually happening in spiritual matters. I let go of all spirituality. enough. Just an extremely ordinary life. Work. Married. New jobs. New girlfriends. studying. Usual living. My dad died, great loss. Years was passing. Five kids.

THEN, something happened, I think it was 2006. I furiously started to reread old spiritual books. Along the road something has happened to me. I do not know what, but something is different. With the internet I found some beautiful clips of Osho. Then the Advaita hits me with full power. This two concepts start to sink in:

- There is no personal self or 'I' in the first place. (remember the American housewife and here Satori)

- we are already awake.

- The sense of 'I am' is not an entity or an object in itself (it certainly can bee felt like that).

- everything exists, but not for 'me'.

- The idea of me is just what it is, an idea.

- Can an idea meditate? No.

- The place where the 'me' should be found, is just aware space

If in the absolute sense all is an illusion, who is meditating? THIS is the reason why meditation isn't possible. This is not to say that practice and effort is meaningless. Spontaneously sometimes the thoughts is less and a opening occurs that makes everything possible. There is no one in the absolute sense that CAN meditate. Meditation can happen, but to no-one. The 'me' is an hypnotic idea appearing in the stream of thoughts. Very natural and completely misleading. The 'me' is not there, never were.

Question the 'me' and everything else collapse.

"Man is in life as an optical illusion of light and not real"

Shankara

"The 'I' can never know higher Time, space, knowledge, because he is the embodied abscens of that kind of knowledge"

Tarthang Tulku

This quotes somehow sums up the main struggle for me.

Another thing is clear for me;

"The discovery of your own 'being' is yours entirely. No-one else has nothing to do with it, including me. The joy and happiness lies in your own discovery of what you are. "
I started this Blog 2007 to use it as a some kind of a diary over my discovery from the Internet. Now I continue the Blog with an another purpose. The Blog is an reflection of my awareness, so to speak. The simple reason that I love the subject, Non-duality. It is meant to point to the Non-dual. To end this all, at last, remember. No words, however well said, never IS what is real. What is, is anyway. There is no point in claiming to be an advanced highly spiritual person, WHO is claiming that? Spiritual materialism.

There is nothing holy in being anti-social or being quiet. Why not talk and write? Why not use a blog?

What I talk about in this blog always remain untouched anyway.

If there is no 'me' in absolute sense, what is the problem? What is there to defence?

This is the story about the character called Roshi who is writing on this blog.

No-one is invited and everyone is welcome.

Namaste

Roshi
　

First post

My intention is to keep the subject as simpel and clear as possible. To begin with It is nothing about me as a person, I am a 'pointer', pointing to a direction. Sometimes I use quotes, but it is from my authority I use it in the texts. If anything is misunderstod it is my fault.

Namaste

Roshi

:-D

New start!

I am back. Now I speak from my own understanding, so to speak. I love the subject. No-one is invited and everyone is welcome.

Be what "you" are.

Namaste

Roshi

This day is your whole life...

I am going to take a break or time out for a while from my blogg. From the beginning it was ment to be a diary for me but I got lot of respons to what I delivered on the blogg. It all started 2007 when I discovered Non-duality. After many years of seeking and practising there were the answers. A great "Ahaa" arisied. In a simpel maner Tony Parsons, Jeff Foster, Nathan gill, and others pointed out a possibility I never had heard before....maybe in me something were ready for the message.....in absolute reality there never was "anyone" there from the beginning, and still...the appearance of a person is there. It IS and it isn't. The living paradox in life.

The reason we miss IT is beacouse of the simplicity of it all and the intimate nature of IT. We all are "That", like the eye can not see itself. We are that seeing, hearing, smelling whatever.

When I start the blogg again, I am going to speak and write from my own window, from the appearance of "Roshi"...if... I start the blogg again. As a last gift, Jeff....latest. And links to the main teachers or what you want to call this "pointers":

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lxEZnYd7gz0

http://www.theopensecret.com/

http://www.lifewithoutacentre.com/

http://www.nathangill.com/index.html

http://www.richardsylvester.com/

Quotes of the day:

"The end of SEEKING, and the end of the SEEKER,is SEEING life as it is..."

"This day is whole your life"

Jeff Foster

This two Books can sum up all this years:

Being: The bottom line Nathan Gill 2006 (ISBN 0955176220)
Already Awake Nathan Gill 2004 (ISBN 0954779223)

Namaste

Roshi

Mooji

Sometimes I listen to Mooji, I really love 'It'. Here is two guided meditations by him, relax and listen...


Part1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xKBySosMIBM&feature=related

Part 2

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7Iq_bnsR1U

Namaste

Roshi

Awakeningstory

Here is a "story" about "awakening" by Joel Morwood, interesting....

....I abandoned my career, friends, and family in search of the Truth to which all the mystics seemed to point. And yet, no matter how hard I tried or how far I traveled, that Holy Grail continued to elude me. Finally, after I had given up all hope of attaining my goal, it happened. In a cheap motel room on the night of August 13, 1983, I Awoke to a Reality at once far more astonishing and, at the same time, far more simple than anything I could have ever imagined. Here is part of what I wrote shortly thereafter:

I jump up, turn on the light, and look around. Sure enough, I no longer see through a glass darkly. The veil has been lifted and the glass has cleared—no, more than cleared—it has vanished! I see the Kingdom, and now I am laughing wildly, because the great joke of it all is
that this exalted Kingdom I have been searching for in such anguish and despair is none other than the very room I have been sleeping in, with its dirty, cinder block walls, frayed curtains, and horribly grungy, blue-green rug! I could have shouted! I could have danced! I could have done anything for that matter, because it really didn’t matter. It didn’t even exist and never had. I was free.

What was it like? What was it not like? How can I tell you? I can't, but I'll be brave and try, anyway...It was not a thought. It was not a feeling. It was not an experience. I was everything. I was nothing. I was everywhere and I was nowhere -- nowhere to be found, hence, nowhere to be lost. Amazing Grace! Sacred Grace! Silly Grace! -- like those nonsensical little phrases that children make up and then laugh and laugh over while poor perplexed adults just shake their heads. And no wonder! You have to be a child to get it. And I was a child, a child sitting on a bed, bathed in rapture...

I had never expected this! What had I expected? Something exceptional, luminous, visionary -- the Platonic Forms behind all forms, or a Transcendental Light wiping out the universe, or maybe the Cosmic Voice of God calling me from eternity -- I don't know, but it wasn't this. This was much, much too obvious. It wasn't even right under my nose, it was my nose. And it was a finger uncurling miraculously in front of my eyes. It was a car horn, sharp and crisp in the night. It was the sound of my sheets rustling as I shifted position on the bed. It was the doorknob effortlessly staring me in the face -- they were all so effortless, and therein lies the true Oneness and Beauty of the world; we are all effortlessly together, brothers and sisters to the stars -- nor do I mean this metaphorically (though metaphor it is), for this was no gauzy vision full of images and archetypes. The Image had burst, and the Light was out, and the Light was everything. The Metaphorical World had come to an end, and I was AWAKE in the REAL WORLD, the world without end.

Joel Morwood

....oh, these stories.

:-D

Namaste

Roshi